lost an important friend

when I was awakened from my reverie, I found I had lost a friend who means a lot to me.
but I still did not recognize it all, and only covered with an empty smile without meaning.

I don't want to admit, if I'm lonely.

I just want to feel loved and adored by everyone.

is it wrong?when there is someone who would accept me, I began to feel that I am also human...


but that's only temporary...
people went away from my side, and make me lonely again...
and makes me not trust anyone....
What's just me, who are destined to live alone?!

if so ... why just me? why? tell me why?!

until when will I have to find answers to all this!? if anyone is willing to accept me like this...